Once upon a time I was a character in a tragic almost-love story …
No, don’t get me wrong over here because I’m not fantasizing or whatsoever. This entry is based on actual events, no less and no further.
I met a handful of new fellow students during my concluding year on secondary school. Of course, I was together with my friendly classmates meeting new people and getting to know them. We’ve made a few acquaintances and added a few to our established crowd. However, do you remember back in high school being awkward with someone? Or being uncomfortable with anyone? I do, I don’t know why but it was purely based on instinct. But how ironic was my life back then? I noticed for some time my ‘friends’ would tease me about an ensuing suitor. Seemingly though, I always had a hunch about whom they were referring to. It turned out that that person I was uneasy about had a crush on me (sends shivers down my spine). And yet again guess what? Apparently, rumor has spread and I was the last one to know. Eventually, that person confessed through writing me a letter initially – handed from some other, then started wooing by texting me. Strictly, right from the start I knew it is not going to be a fairytale.
It was oddly peculiar being courted let alone by another person bearing an X and Y chromosome in the cell nuclei.
This tale of romantic story was few and far between the usual romance. Recognizing that I’m no different from other male species biologically, I differ in terms of character, instinct, and emotion early on. In all conscience, I own up a great deal of dreamy romances of my own. But then I never thought such (so called) romantic affair would bargain me a role. With a personality like mine – reserved and discreet, I’d always have tough situations to say the least. Moreover, to handle and to be in a strange state of affair is tough furthermore.
Eventually, I was immersed in harsher circumstances. People became so indifferent and hypercritical with all their unyielding grilling and conclusions. I knew I took the lead for daily gossips here and there. It was an emotional and psychological struggle. I was hurt, confused and doubly affronted. Albeit our awkward environment, that person sustained to that earlier confession and continued to hope for togetherness. On the other hand, I remain avoidant and aloof. It went like that all the way through commencement and we parted.
Although it happened a few years back I can still hark back to the strain it caused. I have moved on from those moments, I have forgiven the events but undeniably it can’t be totally forgotten. It seemed as though our story just died a natural death, honestly speaking, it was undisclosed. As to my impression, it left an open-ended future yet to be written.
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